I like big butts an´ I cannot lie.
You otha brothas can´t deny.
That when a girl walks in wit´ a itty bitty waist an´
A round thing in yo´ face, you get SPRUNG.
Want to pull up tough, cuz you notice that butt was STUFFED.
Deep in the jeans she has wearin´…
– Sir Mix Alot
When it comes to having big backsides, the world has seen an uncanny and slightly alarming increase in BBL surgeries. The Brazilian Butt Lift, or BBL, is a popular cosmetic surgery procedure that can give patients a more curvaceous backside.
While some may say it boosts their confidence by having a slightly unrealistic and in some cases unhealthy and much enhanced looking figure and backside, some simply do it for the attention they can, or will, get from men or social media (the ego booster and destroyer). As a very lucky full-figured plus-size woman, I find it interesting that the one thing that I was consistently (and in some cases still) mocked for is what is now a global trend. Growing up I was flatter than a board but thanks to excellent genes and an improved appetite as a child, although I was considered a late bloomer, I bloomed beautifully, nonetheless. I remember hating my body because my waist was way too small and my hips were a bit daunting for a sixteen-year-old, yet when I stood around cousins and aunties, especially on my father’s side, I realised we were simply built this way, because trust me when I say my backside needed its own boost of confidence around family (I know literally blessed beyond measure).
Oh where was I? The BBL craze that has hit the world today. So, welcome once again to the old readers and glad to have you here – to the new ones. Today, we’re going to dive deep into the oh-so-trending world of Brazilian Butt Lifts (BBLs) and why the pursuit of Instagram-worthy bodies is just so worth it.
Welcome To The Adventures Of Trials And Buttulations
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“I don’t get bothered by people saying what they say. I’m a happy person and I’m happy with my looks. I’m not an insecure person. I believe if somebody chooses plastic surgery it should be for themselves, not for anyone else.”
— Ashlee Simpson
In this uncanny era of digital “perfection,” where every waking moment is meticulously presented on social media, the question that starts to come up in one’s mind is, why should women embrace their natural bodies? After all, we can avoid the horrors of cyberbullying by simply conforming to societal pressure and submitting ourselves to potentially dangerous cosmetic procedures. Makes total sense, right? Yet in the pursuit of not being the ridiculous target of cyberbullies and their need for unrealistic perfection, many die, become deformed or lose a limp or two.
First, take a clear-eyed look concerning the wonders of BBL – the incredible procedure that promises a butt so unrealistically round and gravity-defying it could probably double as a trampoline, table or even chair. Because, who doesn’t want a derrière that requires a personal assistant or its own GPS just to navigate doorways? From the likes of Big Brother star Mercy Eke, to social media sensation Toke Makinwa, relentless vocal vixen Tonto Dike to even the controversial yet star-studded personality Bobrisky, many Nigerians, especially celebrities, are now clamouring for gravity-defying backsides that can carry out destructive missions, while holding down the earth from floating into a black hole (at least, we can throw something at the aliens if they ever attack…problem may be we may not be able to lift it to throw at this point; these are the issues.)
Celebrities who are major influencers as to how people view what is right or wrong are showcasing the supposed plus-size or a fuller backside, a tiny waist and the attention of a full wallet (this is not to say that a lot of them do not work hard or earn their own money. We cannot undermine people at any point because they are not known personally).
Let’s be honest, some women look incredible when they get their BBLs done by the right doctor, with the right aftercare while infusing exercise and a regulated diet. They look enviable (don’t give me the side eye; have you seen Bernice Bugoes who is even a grandmother…she puts in the work and it shows), yet in the world of high crimes and scamming, many fall into the danger zone of terrible and unfortunate situations where their lives are literally at risk. As much as you want to forget about embracing your unique shape and celebrating your individuality, one must understand that behind closed doors and off camera, there are illicit and negative health issues that are associated or can be perceived as common factors (bear in mind these can be life-changing and permanent) one must be aware of before committing to the BBL lifestyle, be it legal or otherwise. I understand the need to fit into the cookie-cutter mould of societal beauty standards, simply because if the likes of the Kardashians can become instantly famous from it, making it look like: no BBL, no achievements, then, hey, by all means endure and forge forward! However, you must properly understand the many dangers and risks associated with getting a BBL.
Undergoing a BBL is tough, yet people rush to get it even when one of the biggest dangers of getting a BBL is that it can be fatal. Having such a surgery involves transferring fat from one part of the body, such as the abdomen or thighs, to the buttocks. This is done by injecting the fat into the buttocks using a large needle. People must understand that if the fat is not injected properly, it can block blood vessels and cause a fatal blood clot (if this does not aid in your decision making, I do not know what else will).
Another risk in getting a BBL is that it can lead to infections. Some people often suffer more than one, including sepsis which can lead to death or amputation. The surgery involves making incisions in the skin (this reminds me of grilling protein to get the marinade in – sounds terrifying and painful if you’re unfortunate not to experience the full joys of anaesthesia), which can allow bacteria to enter the body. If an infection develops, it can spread to the bloodstream and cause irreparable damage.
In addition to the risks of death and infection (which I seriously believe should be enough reasons not to get a BBL done, or at least get it done legally), there are also a number of other potential complications associated with getting a BBL. These include but are not limited to:
* Bleeding
* Bruising
* Pain
* Numbness
* Fluid collection
* Scarring
* Uneven results
* Distortion of the buttocks
* Need for additional surgery
There are many other risks that you should discuss with your doctor before you decide to undergo the procedure (because people react differently to medications and procedures. And do not forget to let your doctor know you have allergies and what exactly you are allergic to. Keeping quiet is in no one’s interest). So just for clarity and emphasis sake, you can be bedridden for weeks, dealing with potential infections, and even the small chance of death. Think of it as if it’s like playing Russian roulette, but with your butt; Butto roulette (funny but not funny if you are on the wrong side)! You know what they say, nothing screams “worth it?” like putting your life on the line for a more prominent posterior.
While we dally into the dangers and risks of having alien attacking backsides, how can we miss out on the joys of cyberbullying? (because nothing screams more like putting yourself in the line of fire). Instagram (poor Instagram, it’s been bashed so much we have forgotten the original push for creation of it – which was enhancing business and forging cross-border alliances without getting on a plane), the wonderful platform that brought us countless filters and unrealistic ideals (Snapchat is in the same league), has also gifted us a multitude of faceless trolls ready to tear us apart. But fear not, dear readers! Instead of tackling the root causes of cyberbullying, let’s all just change ourselves to fit their twisted standards. Makes perfect sense, doesn’t it? This makes me hiss in African; you could hear it from outer space.
Let’s also not forget the positive impact Instagram has on our mental health. It’s truly a magical space where we can compare ourselves to perfectly curated highlight reels of others and feel utterly inadequate. But hey, at least our butts will be big, right?
If I have written anything of value above, before rounding off this article, I must emphasise this; if you’re considering getting a BBL, it’s important to do your research and choose a reputable surgeon. You should also make sure that you understand all of the risks involved before you make a decision. Getting a BBL with an unlicensed doctor is even more dangerous. Unlicensed doctors are not trained to perform cosmetic surgery procedures, and they definitely do not have the proper equipment or facilities. This can increase the risk of complications, such as infection, blood clots, and death. I know they charge less but your life is worth so much more.
In summary (because every article needs one), sarcasm aside, it’s time to challenge the dangerous narratives perpetrated and perpetuated by Instagram and cyberbullying. It’s crucial to foster a society that values authenticity, diversity, and self-love rather than conforming to unrealistic beauty standards. Remember, you are already worthy and beautiful just the way you are. Don’t let anyone – be it Instagram, trolls, or society as a whole – tell you otherwise. Embrace your unique self, flaws, cellulite, and all, because that authenticity is what truly shines through in a world full of plastic. You are not Barbie, my darlings; neither should you aspire to be one. Till next time.
