THE BUCKET LIST

“The goal is to die with memories, not with dreams”

My earliest vague recollection of what a ‘bucket list’ was when I came across a film by the same name, and I decided to watch it because liked the A-list actors in it: Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. For what it is worth, it is a film everybody should watch.

This 2007 film is about two men who are diagnosed with terminal cancer and happen to share a room. Freeman’s character (Carter) is a blue-collar worker who has a stable life, one wife of forty-five years, children, veteran; while Nicholson’s character (Edward) is a cranky, bitter billionaire with a chain of hospitals as well as a chain of divorces and one lost daughter. Due to a no-exception policy at his own hospital, Edward is forced to share a hospital room with Carter. Edward finds a list of things that Carter would like to do before he “kicks the bucket”, and Edward adds his own wishes to the list and convinces Carter to go with him on a journey of fulfilling these wishes. Along the journey, the themes of old age, marriage, relationships, regrets, wishes, friendships, illness and death are explored. The contrast between the two lead characters offers very beautiful moments of witty spirituous dialogues alternating with funny and dramatic scenes. The film generally failed to deliver but the actors cast did a good job of humanising the end of one’s life, why we should embrace and live life and highlighting the inevitability of death.

There is a story behind how this film came about.

In 1999, a British screen writer, Justin Zackman drew up a list and named it “Justin’s Things to Do before I kick the bucket” and then shortened it to “Justin’s Bucket List”. The first thing on his list? To have his screenplay produced by a major Hollywood studio. And the rest they say is history.

Remembering the theme of the film and the fact that I went ziplining on my recent trip even though it is bungee jumping that I have always wanted to do, set me thinking. I realised that I do have a number of things that I would love to do before I “kick the bucket” but I had not written them down. To crystalise my desires and work towards them, I knew I had to come up with a list as Justin had so that they can become a reality.

Everyone should have a bucket list.

Why? Because we will all die.

So?? Wouldn’t you want to have explored as much of the world or do things that you would not have in the normal course of your life, at least once?

Still, so? Remember that this is the side of eternity, you can see, feel and experience. Also, the command from time immemorial has been for we mere mortals to subdue and enjoy the earth.

To what end? If nothing else, you will have a rush of adrenaline and release of endorphins-feel good hormones and have memories that will leave you with a warm feeling and stories to tell. You won’t kuku remember anything after you die.

Listening. The world is your oyster. You make if it what you will. Ok, granted there are some very unfortunate beings you will have the displeasure of meeting along your life path that might truncate your life, distort your reality or taint it; either way your life is still in your hands.

I have decided to break the bucket list into 7 areas that you should list at least one thing you would like to experience, using all your senses.

Keep your list to yourself, people spoil good things. Be selective as to who you want to accompany you or help you fulfil your bucket list. Caveat: These buckets of the main bucket are amoral. I am not considering morality, religion or spirituality; just having a human experience. A bucket list should ideally start as soon as you have control of your life which would be in your 20s but when did we even realise that we should be planning an exit strategy, but better late than never. So, start today.

1. Travel destinations– Just watching Discovery channel should motivate you for this category and it isn’t just the destination but the areas of interest in these places. One thing though: NOT SHOPPING!!!!!!!!!! This is the lightest you should travel. Travel can be local, then regional and international. Either way, the cure to a mad mind and narrow way of thinking is to travel. There is nothing that shows you the “diversity” of God like seeing the different types of terrain, people, culture, way of living than those who are radically different from you!

2. Career goals– Overthrowing your boss might not be a good way to start this list and will take the joy out of you as you plot. So why don’t we do something that is more enjoyable and within your paygrade? Simply. A bucket list is to be fun. What do you want to achieve in your career that will bring pure joy (yes, leave your boss out of this! Unless you are boss!) Is it to get another degree? Become a mentor? Lead? Win an award in your career or industry? Explore another area? Switch career?

3. Try foods : Duke Orsino in Shakespeare’s Twelfth Night: “If music be the food of love, play on!” Well even though this was directed at music, we get the same reaction from food-“if delight be the force of food, eat on!” I’d say. The realisation that food brings us pleasure is why we have struggled with it from time to time. Food at a stage was a means of survival but food has evolved to the point that there are some gastronomical delights that it would be wrong not to try before you kick the bucket. Not just to try a meal or two but try a cooking or baking class. Learn to make a cocktail or two? Learn to grill something. What is the worse that can happen? Pack on a few pounds because every single thing you ingest, you will shit and pee out (there was no other way than to be that clear!) On my list is to visit The Carnivore restaurant in Kenya and eat whatever meat they put before me. As a true foodie and epicurean, I say eat on!

4. Learn a skill or pick up a hobby. That we are imbued with a talent or skill is nothing new but going out to learn something that isn’t inherent in you is a good way to build your bucket list. Go and learn something.

5. Sexual fantasies: Majority of us fight with accepting the fact that we are sexual beings. We go through life with the guilt of acknowledging pleasure or wanting it and short-changing ourselves in one of nature’s mysteries-sexual pleasure. Now was pleasure the first by product of sex in the very beginning, I doubt it since the explicit command was to breed and subdue the earth. However, trust the human mind to go over and beyond it the scope of its engagement. This gave birth to further in-depth studies if what exactly the human body can experience as pleasure. Now all sorts of explorations have been done to attain these heights of pleasure. The sex menu is so diverse now that ….hmmm…anyway….this should be on your bucket list….what is the height of pleasure you can attain? Have you truly been to “O-land O?” If only for a moment, or an hour….each time you remember-you will smile. Disclaimer/high pressure warning: what you do after this once in a lifetime experience is none of my business. I have only advocated for one, or two ok or three experiences-these things can be addictive….

6. Fears to overcome: Snakes? Put one round your neck, Bungee jumping? Throw yourself off a ledge!! Hot coals? What has fire on you??Nothing!! It is your mind telling you it is hot. LOL. But seriously, there are things that you fear and what better way to swing through life trying to slay them? If nothing out you will come out screaming and maybe a slight heart attack (ok, exercise some caution)

This list is by no means exhaustive, but you get the point. Hopefully.